Practical and Doable Habits for Happy Marriages
Shaunti Feldhahn’s latest 2014 release, The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages: The Little Things That Make a Big Difference highlights “simple, learnable habits that are common to highly happy couples.” She focused on finding things other couples can replicate as they work toward bettering their marriages.
I appreciate that Feldhahn included a former chief of survey design for the U.S. Census Bureau in building her surveys. And, she used the services of Decision Analysis, a top company for reliable online surveys. Because of that, her statistics and analysis are credible and reliable.
I think readers will find some of the habits shocking, like “go to bed mad.” Other habits include: believe the best, know that little is big, boss your feelings, keep score, use sign language, and have actual fantasies. Some are not what you think. All of them are simple (not necessarily easy) and doable, though, as Feldhahn shows through statistics and stories from couples she interviewed.
The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages includes a variety of strategies and ideas that sound promising. But with so many great ideas and habits, where do you even start? Feldhahn addresses that in her introduction, and I agree with her: “Pick one idea first, and try it for a week or two or five. Then when that action becomes a habit, start on another.”
Feldhahn also provides practical help in the final chapter, “Putting the Secrets to Work” where she gives “Ten Anyone-Can-Do-Them Tips” for applying the secrets of highly happy marriages. That may be a great place to start when thinking about what habits to develop first.
With that in mind, some of the following will prove helpful for couples looking to put into place some new habits:
• The Fast Fives for Him and for Her in chapter 2
• Tips for changing how you feel in chapter 6
• Ideas for overcoming challenges to together time in chapter 9
• A picture of what “looking higher” looks like in chapter 11
• Ways to get “all in” in chapter 12
The only regret I have about this book is the cover design. It looks rather feminine with pink and green, and I sincerely hope that won’t keep men from picking up this book as they’ll benefit from it just as much as women will.
I highly recommend this book to any couple wanting to increase marital happiness. These research-based habits of highly successful marriages are practical, helpful and doable. You can start as soon as you pick up the book and start to read. So, whether your marriage is good and you’re looking for great, or whether your marriage is less-than-good looking for good—this book has some interesting and anyone-can-do habits that will help you get where you want to go.
Note: I received this book for free from Blogging for Books for this review. However, the opinions expressed are my own.
Connect with author Shaunti Feldhahn at:
Visit the publisher’s website where you can order the book, read an excerpt, view video content, and more: http://waterbrookmultnomah.com/catalog.php?work=48707
Read an excerpt at: http://waterbrookmultnomah.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/SneakPeek_SurprisingSecretsHappyMarriages.pdf
About Shaunti Feldhahn
Shaunti received her graduate degree from Harvard University and was an analyst on Wall Street before unexpectedly becoming a social researcher and best-selling author.
Today, she applies her analytical skills to investigating eye-opening, life-changing truths about relationships, both at home and in the workplace. Her groundbreaking research-based books, such as For Women Only, have sold more than 2 million copies in 22 languages and are widely read in homes, counseling centers and corporations worldwide.
Where the “Only” series revealed the often-unseen needs of men and women, her newest multi-year research project, published in The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, investigates the process of what makes great relationships.
Shaunti’s findings have been featured in media as diverse as The Today Show and Focus on the Family, The New York Times and MomLife Today. Shaunti, Jeff and their two children live in Atlanta and enjoy every minute of living life at warp speed.
Published 11 months ago by Laura Langley